Affection and Flirting in Spanish!

February 25, 2024

¡Cariño y coqueteo en español!

Valentine’s Day is wonderful, but it doesn’t have to be the official holiday for love to be a good day to express admiration and affection – admiración y cariño. Such expressions in Spanish might help you make new friends, find a romantic partner, or maybe just discover a fun way to flirt. You'll also be practicing your Spanish. ¡Qué maravilloso!

As you probably know, Spanish is referred to as a romance language, but this designation isn’t about Spanish being romantic, even though many believe it is a very romantic language to hear and read in songs, novels, and poems. In fact, “romance language” is a term used to refer to any language that is derived from Latin, the language of the Roman Empire. 

More history later. This blog is the first installment about the art of flirting in Spanish. We will learn a few phrases so that you can show some interest in someone you might like to flirt with and get to know a bit better. 

Similar to trying to tell a joke in a language you’re learning, being romantic or flirting as a Spanish learner can be tricky. Ultimately, the best way to learn flirting, or any manner of speaking in Spanish, is to listen to native speakers. (Boulder Spanish offers travel and immersion experiences for students at all levels.) 

Remember, in each country, region, even each city or town you visit, the native Spanish speakers will have their own phrases and idioms for flirting. We will do our best in this blog post to get you started with some basic “get-to-know-you” phrases, with a touch of affection, and perhaps, also familiarize you with what you might hear yourself from a Spanish-speaking admirer. Hey, you never know… 

So let’s begin with the word for flirting in Spanish. Coquetear – to flirt.

Por ejemplo:

Coqueteo con él porque es guapo. – I flirt with him because he’s handsome.

Ella le sonrió dulcemente y dijo, "¿Estás coqueteando conmigo?" – She smiled sweetly at him and said, “Are you flirting with me?” 

For the noun, a flirt is coqueto/coqueta. You can tease someone nicely, with a smile, by saying,

¡Eres un coqueto! – You are such a flirt!

A couple of ground rules: first and foremost, and in any situation, always be friendly and be kind. Sea siempre amigable y amable. Once you’re ready to get to know someone more and perhaps to flirt, be sincere and caring. If you get turned down or the person is not interested, be polite and gently move on. 

Begin with a genuine smile. Experts say a happy smile has a way of opening doors – una sonrisa feliz tiene una forma de abrir puertas. The person you're trying to connect with may smile back, and now you’re ready to introduce yourself. 

Hola, soy… o Hola, me llamo… – Hi, my name is…”

¿Cómo te llamas? – What’s your name?

¿De dónde eres? – Where are you from?

¿Puedo invitarte una bebida? – May I buy you a drink?

¿Quieres bailar? – Would you like to dance?

Once you are sharing a nice conversation and enjoying each other’s company, you might want to ask to see them again. You can say:  

Me gusta mucho hablar contigo y me encantaría verte otra vez. – I really like talking with you and I’d love to see you again. 

Quisiera conocerte mejor. – I’d like to get to know you better.

¿Te gustaría salir conmigo algún día? – Would you like to go out with me someday?

Me gustaría salir contigo. – I would like to go out with you.

Podríamos dar un paseo y cenar juntos, si quieres.  – We could take a walk and have dinner together, if you like.

¿Puedo tener tu número de teléfono o correo electrónico? – May I have your telephone number or email address? 

Aquí tienes mi número de teléfono. – Here’s my phone number.

In a future blog post, we’ll get into some richer romantic and flirty phrases that will help you express your feelings in a deeper or certain way, perhaps (wink, wink) (guiño, guiño)

For this early encounter with a new friend, you may want to express mutual affection. Quizás querias expresar afecto mutuo.

Nos llevamos muy bien, verdad? – We get along very well, right?

Nos llevamos bien juntos, ¿no es así? - We get along well together, don't we?

And when it’s time to go, you may want to leave a good impression or express a desire to stay in contact or be together again. 

¿Cuándo podrenos reunirnos de nuevo? – When can we meet again? 

No puedo dejar de pensar en ti. ¿Cuando te puedo volver a ver? – I can’t stop thinking about you. When can I see you again? 

Te extrañaré. ¿Podemos mantenernos en contacto? – I will miss you. Can we stay in touch? 

Te voy a extrañar – I’m going to miss you. Tip: Use this phrase when you’re parting ways with someone to let them know you enjoy being with them and will miss them after they (or you) leave.

And once you’re apart, keep the affection going, if it’s real, and use these phrases. 

Te extraño – I miss you. (This is most common in Latin American Spanish.)

Te echo de menos – I miss you. (This is most common in Spain.)

Ojalá estuvieras aquí (conmigo). – I wish you were here (with me).  

And if you hear or read these phrases from your cariño (sweetheart), you can respond with, Yo también – once again demonstrating the useful word también – la palabra utíl también.

Por ejemplo: 

Yo también te extraño – I miss you, too. Or in Spain, Yo también te echo de menos

Eso es todo por ahora. Diviértete y sigue practicando, porque nunca se sabe… 

Hasta la proxima vez.